Goddess of Clutziness and Mishearing

Wow, I have internet accesss for once! Thanks Angie!
Happy Delayed Birthday Josh! I have a present for you. WHen will I see you?... I am going on vacation with my family for the next two weeks. I won;t see anyone for ages. Sadness!
Ok, I am out of things to type at this moment in time.
Bye!

Wow, I totally don't have anything to write, but i feel like i should. Go me.

I had my first real day of work at Target today... many hours of cashiering... funness...

Real funness = Lauren and Jess being in town this weekend! I am muy excited!

It is my friend Anna Flora's 19th birthday today... i am reminded of the fact that I am really only 18. Why is it that I don't feel 18? I don't hang out with anyone who is 18, I don't even know how 18 year olds are supposed to act... i suppose like immature high schoolers or something. Stupid age; at least it really doesn't seem to matter to anyone that actually matters to me. You guys all treat me just the same as you would if I wasn't such a young age, and it doesn't seem to matter to Colin or anyone there either. Thank goodness for you all. I love you guys to death.

I watched Brazil with Colin and the H11 people the other night. One of my favorite movies, actually, as strange as it is, which is actaully probably why I love it. Plus it has one of my very favorite movie lines ever, "Care for a little necrophilia?"! Oh Joy! I love just pulling that line out at random times! It is very enjoyable and amusing to me. Have any of you seen Brazil? What did you think (I know Angie hates it...). Colin and Pat told me they were to overwhelmed at the end of the movie to give me an opinion. I guess I have to wait for judgement in the future. It took me nearly a year to come to the conclusion that i loved it, so I understand their perplexity perferctly.

Speaking of death, I just realized that I am not a minor and thus am not under my parents guardianship and just signed a paper authorizing them to pull the plug on me if I ever turn into a vegetable. Whew, impending crisis avoided... Teri Shivoishwise... not that i am planning on turning into a vegetable or anything... so I guess it really wasn't an impending crisis...

I feel so fricking lazy these days. I want it to get nice out again so I can go outside. If I am being lazy and unproductive, at least i want to do it outside. And if it is nice out we can have bonfires and hike and play risbee and so forth... basically some of the awesomest things ever!

Wow! Awesome Detroit weekendness!
Love to everyone, because you are all wonderful. Thanks for everything, my dear Lauren. I miss Bosco and Molls... I called Max Bosco today... and was saddened. Wicked makes me so happy too.
Pita cafe.
Rexy's.
Portland and icecream adventures with Jackie.
7-11 slupies rock my world.
Yay for Berkely people!
Chris sucks though, he totally ditched us the whole weekend... shame on you sir! You could have totally taken off an hour to hang out with us at some point, couldn't have you? I mean, 'couldn't you have'?... yeah... you get the alex growl... arrrrrrrrrggggrrrrrrrrrrr.

I HAVE A JOB! I am going to be working at Target over the summer! A job A job A job! I really Really needed this! Excitement!

And I got a ticket for speeding by the meadows on Friday night... I had a panic attack and cried at the police guy.

Happy weather!

So, Yay!
Happy funness of Applebees with (most) of my favorite people... of course, there were a ton of my favorite people missing, but it was still delightful. And it makes me really happy to see that Colin gets along with my friends too, I mean, he seemed to, he and Angie sure hit it off, or so it seemed to me, and he certainly put up well with being the person-in-between-fighting-Jackie-and-Alex... being glared over and having things thrown around and over you is always fun.

Has anyone else seen the movie 28 days later? It is supposed to be quite bad for a horror movie, and i suppose, if I were looking for a horror movie, I would be quite disappointed (there were a ton of times they could have thrown in more horrorish stuff, but they refrained, and it was better for it, in my opinion), but i wasn't, and I certainly was very pleasently surprised. The cinematography was really supuerb, which is incredible for a horror film, and i am sure all of you non-film peoples out there really don't care, but I know that we, being film people, spent the whole movie, being like, "wow, that is a marvelous shot", or "he he he, I wonder what type of filter they put that throught to get those blurring effects"... I know, we're dorks, but hey, we enjoy and embrace our film dorkhood. Also, famous line of unintentional alex-punnage/implicationage/double meaningage... "He wants to go out with a bang." I amaze myself.

Grades... I was scared... and I needed to be, I think... It could have been worse...
I aced my film class, which was the one that mattered the most to me and the one I put in the most work on, when I got that email, I yelped for joy. A!
Sociology, Tae Kwon Do, Orchestra... A!
Honors Geology... B+ ! Definitly better then it was for a while, so me studying for my final exam so much definitely paid off! Yay!

And then Acting II... C+... yuck... bleh! I knew it... She really grades on how well you act... and i suck, obviously...

And my grade point turned out to be a 3.506.. which, *whew* means I keep my scholarships, barely, (the cutoff was a 3.5), but, whew...

Congratulations H6 on your lovely apartment of all cleanness and beauty!

Almost!
I just finished my last evam, and I had the amazing feeling that I had actually overstudied! Which is insane because I studied for an hour and a half right before class.
All done with all of my exams!
Done!
Finished!
*shrieks with joy and bounces around happily*

I do have to write a paper for theatre still, but EXAMS are over!


Everyone who reads this (and everyone who doesn't as well) is coming to my play tonight. It is mandatory, I mean it.
All Men Are Whores... who can reisit a name like that?
7:30 in Louis Armstrong Theatre, but get there at 7 or you won't get seats!
Please come! It would mean so much to me... *hopeful puppy face*

Good luck to everyone who hasn't finished exams yet, and a special good luck to Ang on her semester-long-project-that-she-is-just-now-starting.

Wish me luck tonight!

Argh! Need to focus and get Sociology paper done!

What is my problem? I am beyond distracted... I think i have checked livejournal 3-4 times in the past hour and a half, gotten several drinks, called my sister, walked around Henry, checked facebook, looked up images of global warming on google, gone outside, come back in, looked at the pita cafe menu I still have from detroit, opened my soiology notebook, and have still not written a single word of my paper.

I need to concentrate! Badly! I have to write my 6 page sociology final paper by tomorrow and i still havn't figured out what I am writing it on.

I did have ice cream earlier though... see! That is what i am talking aobut! I should be concentrating on my paper and I am thinking about my stomache instead, and just about everything in the world but cultural sociology.
O Damnation!
Should i put on music? Will that help me concentrate or distract me more?

Why am I still writing?

There are two fountains outside of padnos/henry... which is why my Honors Geology partner and i were completely unable to meet up today and put together our presention for tomorrow. We were both there at the right time, at fountains outside of padnos, but at different fountains! It was pretty funny once i realized what had happened, three hours later.

I have Mae running through my head.

Disconnected thoughts.

I am done lj-ing, and am now going to write... a... paper... now...please!

I am really proud of everyone who did the Christians represent love not hate thing by the blue structure. I am Really proud of you, and I love you guys very much.

What was I going to write about? I was planing on saying something?

Oh, guess what? I got punched about 30 times yestereday, about half of them in the face. This doesn't sound like happy news, but it is, becuase I got punched because I was sparring with black belt tae kwon do instructors during my purple belt testing (1st rank above the novice white belt). I had never sparred before and i really sucked, but it was fun ...and slightly painful... but very interesting. And I broke a board and did all of the routines and stuff and i am now a purple belt. I was so intimidated because all of the other people who were testing with me were big guys, and they were all killing me in sparring, and they all broke the boards easily, but I was in a horrible state of " i am a weakling girl" and was convinced that i couldn't break it. Everyine in the class laughed at me (in a good, encouraging way) when i DID break it because I had this look of complete and utter disbelied and jubulation on my face. It was awesome and i feel incredibly accomplished now...

And I should be writing a paper rather than livejournaling.

Bad Alex! Write Paper NOW!

Oh, I am happy!

happy happy and happy

yay happiness and randomness and wonderfulness.

Am I glowing?

And to top it all off my latest Whore practice rocked, Matt actually said that monologue number 10 (which is my failing seductivenss one) was good... rather then giving me my normal 2 million notes and corrections... and I don't think it was pity either!

And I have easter candy and bunny ears... what could be better?

I will get around to doing the six things eventually. I promise.

Right now I am worried about learning to be seductive... again... that seems to be all that is on my mind lately. Boo. I had a one-on-one practice with Matt yesterday and we went over the scene where I am supposed to be oozing seductivity like 20 times. I was about ready to start bawling. seriously. I felt like a little kid trying to imitate a seductive person, and I am sure that is how it looked too. Absolutely stupid! And I am sure I a really dissappointing Matt too. I mean, I can't help that fact that I am not a seduction-inclined person, but i am an actress and I should be able to portray that "Hi I am here, fuck me" attitude that he wants me to portray. I suck.

Argh...

Happy delayed birthday Ashley!

Lots and lots of editing.

So, I have Whore practice from 12-3 on Saturday... not really a big problem by itself, actually no problem, becuase I love Whore practice. However, today I found out that I have a concert for my string orchestra class on that same day from 12:30 - 3ish... uh oh... why, you ask? Well, I have already caused Matt major probblems with not being at practices and being late to practices (all basically due to circumstances out of my control, but I don't feel like any less of a shit for it. And Matt made me promise VERY SERIOUSLY not to even be late to another practice, let alone miss it) and I have missed several orchestra classes due to my skipping them to work on film projects, with the result that my orchestra teacher called me up and informed me that if I missed another practice (let alone a fricking concert!) I would fail the class.
So... dilemma dilemma dilemma dilemma!
What do I do? Moral obligation/ professionalish actors obligation versus my orchestra grade.

Yikes!

So, I accidently pulled an almost all-nighter last night.
Editing, of course.
My day was packed, filming and play practice, and then I got to the labs around 9 pm and 'cause neither Lauren or I had eaten since the morning or showered for a few days (due to the extrenuating circumstances of extreme editingness), we went back to H6 to eat and SHOWER!
Which is the best thing I have ever experienced, by the way. Hot water and shampoo are my favorite things ever!
Then I went back to the lab at midnight, planning on having an energy drink and working until like 3 am or so... instead i had an energy drink and worked with utter absorption and tirelessness and mucho mucho energy and focus until six fricking thirty in the morning! AHHHHHH! Then i suddenly crashed, was completely drained and drove back to H6 and fell asleep around 7. Lauren woke me up an hour and a half later (as I had ask her to at 11 o'clock the previous night) for my ten o'clock class... when I rose in a zombie-like state at 9:30, and stumbled into the kitchen, Angie and Sara took one look at me (well, two... one look each) and sent me back to bed (On Angie's amazingly comfortable bed). Thank you, thank you, thank...zzzzzzzzz

Lauren's hard drive is possessed.

It looks like tonight may be similar...
.... oh god....

I am an idiot... it is all due to video editing though. I am not really that much of an idiot in real life... actually, I retract that statement, I am an idiot in real life. But still!

Firstly, I was panicking because I couldn't seem to find the edits I made to my movie last night when I was working today. Now, as I am leaving the lab, I realized that the reason I couldn't find my stuff was that I didn't save to my hard drive yesterday, but to the computer i was working on! How stupid can you get?! Argh!

Oh, and then I was all freaked out because this clip I was working with was showing up as mostly black with a few little random flashes of picture, but i knew the clip didn't look like that... turns out I was zoomed in about 400%. You are a genius, Alex!

I need food and a rest from the evils of editing!
H6 here I come!

I was very thiefish today... partially on purpose and partially on accident. First of all, I am broke and did not have a lunch and was planning on starving this noon (which is bad period, but even worse when one is sickly), when I realized that student employees got free hot dog lunches outside... so, for five minuites, I was a student employee... my stomache is full now, and I figure they would have had extra anyway and should be able to spare a bit of fodder for a poor starving sickly soul. And then I stole a cup from lower Kirkoff... a 20 cent cup to be honest, but still... I had no idea you were supposed to pay for cups, I thought they were a general resource, like utinsils.

Sara is my favorite mother-figure ever!

I fell asleep in my Honors Geology class today. It is a tiny class, like 20 people, and I sit at the front table, so everyone saw it happen, and they all left me sleeping until the end of class and then woke me up and told me they thought i needed the sleep. Then the teacher told me he was honored by me and proud of the fact that I made the effort to come to class when I was so obviously ailing.

I love clear skies, even if it isn't all that warm out.

Thank you to everyone for wishing me well, I love you!

I am sick again.

I have almost no voice.

It's true. Jackie thinks I am faking 'cause it randomly was going up and down and in and out of pitch and scratchiness earlier, but it is true. I could hardly talk around 6... which was when I had play practice. I felt really bad about it, because I felt like I was letting my director, Matt, down a lot. Even though it was not my fault i got sick, my lack of talkingability was affecting him and his play directingabiltiy.

Ang, did you get my note about my Cruel Intention thievery?

I put in upwards of 11 hours on my video this weekend. i can't tell how its going either, other then the fact that Brian and Katie are so fricking cute and in love that it is almost painful for me to watch, let alone for me to spend like 10 hours editing shots of them being cute and in love. It makes me mushy and achy inside at the same time. But, on the upside, Katie makes a brilliantly ethereal ghost!

Innerectual... the tendency to think with one's penis rather then one's head... a common trait among males. And an Alex word... through tongue-slippage, which is a common trait among Alex's.

And it is spring, ladies and gentlemen! Warm weather of all wonderfulness and amazingness and baskingness and so forth. I took a long walk with my boojs today. They are happy about the warmth as well, although they are shedding like the devil. Does the devil shed? He he he... if some ultra-conservative-close-minded person ever tells me I am going to meet the devil, will henceforth picture meeting a yeti.

Just a note of apology to anyone who I have babbled on about ex-boyfriends to recently (I can think of at least 4 people off the top of my head): This is not a normal subject of dwelling for me. One of my close friends is going through a getting-back-together with her exboyfreind-who-used-to-be-an-asshole-but-Apparently-no-longer-is and I am really not happy with the whole situation. I think she is rebounding badly and is just going to get hurt more and have thus been worried and stressing over her situation, and have thus had the subject of ex-boyfriends and bitterness and venomosity on my mind lately. So yeah, sorry to all who have been subjected to this torturous subject.

I have a very interesting job proposal for the summer... I am quite divided over it, the problem of the loss of my time and the unusualness and uncomfortablility of the job verses the need for money and for my parents to stop bitching about my lack of jobedge and the possible emotional growth I could experience. Hmmmmm...

Springtime (for Hitler and Germany)!
…speaking of which: “If you’ve got it, flaunt it!” (like sexy Lauren last night)…

I am in this incredibly blurry state right now. There are a whole bunch of things I am really confused and questioning myself about right now, and I feel like I have about 20 different little Alex's inside me pulling me in different directions in relation to these problems. I am trying not to think of the huge projects I have looming over my muddled head right now, but by ignoring them I am only making things worse for myself in the long run.
Garrrr...
That was Alex the Confusedly Tiredly Slightly-Annoyedly Resiliently Defiant Pirate.

So, do you guys think I can do a male monologue for my Shakespeare auditions? I am not trying out for a male part or anything, and I am certainly not having sexual-identity confusion, but i really want to do this one Romeo monologue for the audition... partly because I already have it memorized and it will contrast to the Whore monologue I am also planning on using... I am not lazy or anything.

Jackie and I left Josh Spaninga a creepy stalker message earlier, 'cause we were in the 4th floor of the library and saw him walking to class. It was fun. I think we may have ruined the creepy part by giggling...

Damn, I am so tired right now. Insomnia sucks.

Leftover Thai food for lunch rocks though!

Anybody else find these quotes from a golf article my theatre teacher gave us to be intriguingly sexual?
They are even funnier if you read them out loud in an interesting, semi-lecturing-semi-seductive voice. Try it. The article was called: "Relax: less stress equals more power"

"When you learn to waggle away your worries and swing tension-free, you'll find your distance and accuracy will greatly improve."

"One of the secrets to my power is my exceptionally large...shoulder."

"When you waggle, remember to make it a leisurely waggle, not an aggressive one because the idea is to promote a long smooth swing, whereas a short, fast waggle promotes a short, fast swing."

and my favorite:
"When I waggle, I focus on relaxing my hands, wrists, arms and shoulders, and I concentrate on feeling the movement of the clubhead in my fingers."

And it wasn't just me, I swear it, my whole class was giggling away madly.
Off to explore gypsum mines!
And to Detroit!
yay!
Alex

Um, I am tired and really need to take a shower and unmake the semi-greaser direction that my hair is leaning in... that of course being the result of waking up on Wednesday 10 minites before I was supposed to be in class, and then spending the night at H6... which was amazing as usual, but I really have a greaser thing going on right now... not as bad as Dicky in that one insane hair-standing-up-through-its-own-natural-greases picture, but still pretty bad.
I had the most amazing spring break ever! In the entire history of spring breakness. I had an awesome van filled with the most incredible people in the world (and actually spent the whole week surrounded by wonderful people, not just my van but everyone on the trip). Worked hard and really felt like I did something, between roofing and weeding and painting and playing with cubanishhispanicish kids and communing heart to heartly with my van and playign ultimate frisbee and getting smashed in the face and talking with God for the first time ever and playing euchre and singing and eating and eating and gaining weight with Donna's amazing food and beaching and body surfing and talking to an old guy about his life and lipsticking myself with paint and sleeping in the van on Bill's butt and witnessing pink belly and mooselicking and Angie's mon's amazing cookies and bonding bonfires and Derrik and Josh and Jackie and finally seeing a good side... no, an amazingly enlightening side to religion and getting really sunburned and eating at waffle house and playing psychiatrist and crazy talent shows and meeting really cool new friends and jellyfish and lizards and chickenducks and spending an amazing week away from my everyday worries and stresses...
Yeah, it was awesome.
Sorry. I really don't exprect that anyone actually read that, other then possibly the people who went on the trip with me...
I need to sign up for classes... I have no idea what I want to do next year.
I love you all.
Alex

I have been in the weirdest mood today. I feel quite out of it and rather depressed, but I really can't pinpoint why. Or, I can a little, but I really don't think that what I could be depressed about should be affecting me. And, just like Angie, I spent the whole weekend not doing what i was supposed to be doing, namely my sociology midterm... which I am actually supposed to be doing now as well... and now I am even more swamped and REALLY don't feel like working. Reasons not to be doing my Soc midterm:

-I am tired.

-I don't want to write about proms because it reminds me of my exfriends from high school and that is just depressing.

-I have a vundervul cup o' chai, and it makes me stomache 'appy, and I wants to savor dis feeling rather than typing. (and that was the weirdest mix of accents ever)

-I would rather be doing livejournal... wait! I am!

-I can't feel my fingers. My house is so cold that I am wearing five layers on top and I am still freezing, and I can hardly move my joints to type. If I sit on my fingers, I can feel the cold positivly seeping out of them.

-I want chocolate mocha cheesecake, but there is none left.

-I read an amazing book today and want time to think about it.

- I feel this insane need to do something physical, like running or playing freeze tag of having a slush ball fight or riding my bike or playing red rover or ultimate frisbee or something! But it is dark outside and cold.

-I want a new icon... another way to procrastinate!

-Gar!

-My chai is cold, I just discovered this.

Goodbye, wish me luck on my midterm writingness.
~Alex

Dave put me in a listy mood.
1. RENT makes me very happy!
2. I am sorry I annoy Jackie by singing under my breath... I can't help it... I did manage to gain control of my vocal cords for the second half of the movie... after I realized you were about to kill me.
3. Nudie pictures of Erin are fun.
4. It is hard when two of your friends are breaking up, and are both hurting, are really aren't even sure if they want to break up, and you don't want to have to decide between them in any way.
5. Lauren made an awesome impression on my family. They love her and this reflects positivly on me, Lauren, and all of the H's, 'cause they are her friends too!
6. I suck at acting. And I failed my scene in Theatre today... but I wrote a rockingly wonderful character bio on Angies computer at 1:00 last night.
7. I am in a heap of trouble because I forgot to put the film equitment my group needs for the weekend on hold.
8. It is my Grandma's 80-something-biggish birthday tomorrow.
9. I am going to bed, yay!